Jessica Simpson Still Really Fat

Jessica Simpson fat



We have just received some breaking news coming off the AP wire, singer and actress Jessica Simpson is still really fat. This should ease the mind of millions of Americans who were no doubt wondering if Jessica Simpson was still a wide load.


Being from the Middle East I can appreciate a really fat woman like Jessica Simpson. Fat women are useful because they are hearty and in times of hardship they can continue to plow the fields feasting on their own fatty tissue for energy. Also in times of extreme hardship they can be roasted on a spit, and provide essential protein for the males of the clan.


Jessica Simpson is certainly stocking up on her fat reserves. Either she expects this to be a long harsh winter or she fears a double dip recession, because she is being extremely mindful to only eat foods with a high caloric content and to live a sedentary life style.


I applaud Jessica Simpson for getting really fat in these difficult times. If things take a turn for the worse Jessica will be able to sustain thousands of lives with her bloated fatty carcass. Allahu Akbar!


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19 votes
  1. i hate victoria justice

    eww she got ugly

  2. nhngnggf

    Most men like a little cushin for the pushin. You can't get your cock up ona woman like sarah jessica parker.

  3. Reton Axwell

    Hey I agree with most of the stuff u were saying but about westerners, maybe just a few of us are actually ok.

  4. Lyza

    Aww, big boy disabled the "reply" option.
    I replied on something else.
    Look at it! Look at it! Puh puh puh pleeeease!
    This was fun.

    YEEWWWVE been served!

  5. roflmao

    Why aren't driver's ed and sex ed taught on the same day in the middle east?
    The camels would get too tired.

  6. Nichole

    What in the Hell is going on with her these days? First she abandons what could've been a great pop star career to sing country for whatever reason then she's been packing on the pounds which by the way does not look good on her whatsoever. I mean, she's a cute girl and I loved hearing her music..I just don't get why she's doing all she's doing...seems a bit weird to me.

  7. Lyza

    Ohh,
    I get what you're trying to do.

    Fat, brown, and bitter at those west of Africa.

    Go back home, terrorist.
    I get it and everything. This is your life...worrying about other people and their lives.

    Blogging about people you'll never be able to put your tiny little brown pecker in.

    At least you've reached at least one of your goals -- pissing people off on the internet.
    When someone gets mad at you, then you get to type out your cutting (yet frothy) comebacks and feel like you're just hilarious for a day!

    So, props.

    Let us know when you reach your other goal of growing your nasty ass beard out down to your toes.
    Or achieving a genetic miracle and having a little baby girl with your favorite goat that you fuck routinely!

    Kisses!

  8. Jayne

    Wow, the world is shallow. She is a beautiful person and she isn't screwing up her life like other celebrities. Is this the best you can do? All you have written about is her weight, like anyone cares. I f they do care then they probably have nothing better to do. Oh, and lastly, what happened to religious tolerance?

  9. Jenny

    and who are YOU, YOU MUSLIM PIG, to be talking about an AMERICAN that way????????? Go talk about your own people. they have enough problems. LEAVE US AMERICANS ALONE. Osama (Yo daddy mama) Bin Laden wears one of them turbans... HE is your leader you terrorist freaks!!!!!! Go get em tiger!!!!!! I'm surprised you even KNOW english, you are probably using a transelator....

  10. Jenny

    all people who wears them funny clothes like them women wear and the men that wear the turbans on their heads are TERRORIST!!!!!!!!! stay outta my country you TERRORIST!!!!! i think America should ban all muslims!!!!!!!! and all Americans who have converted to Islam should go be de brainwashed. Cuz Islam is a LIE and BIG LIE. There IS only one God , and allah is NOT HIM. NOT AT ALL !!!!!! My best friend is a American Muslim and it makes me very sad.

  11. Jenny

    you are a bunch of STUPID people. So what she gained weight, she is so beautiful !!!!!!! AND YOU, ARE STUPID, I WOULD BURN A QUARAN IN FRONT OF YOU WHILE EATING BACON!!!!!!!! HOW'S THAT YOU LAME TURD !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you are soooooooooooooo mean and guess what????????? ALL MUSLIMS ARE GONNA GO TO HELL unless they acknowledge Jesus is Lord, and Jesus is the Son of God.

  12. theheadchimp

    Somebody can tell Captain Ahab we know where Moby Dick is.

  13. Abdullah The Sheik of Tikrit

    I would not let this rotund infidel anywhere near my livestock!

  14. Fat Housewife

    Wow, I never knew I was that well-equipped for that many things. I'm going to show this to my doctor, who says that my ice cream and chocolate consumption is hazardous to my health or something. And if he doesn't like it then I'll go to Afghanistan for my next doctor appointment

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